The Four Faces of Me

By W. Edward Gregory
© 2012
Bio
About 400 words

 

While struggling to create a banner for this site, I subconsciously chose the four faces and phases of Ed Gregory as writer.

  • Soldier
  • Reporter
  • Songwriter
  • Geek

At the far left, is Ed Gregory the soldier. This was in Vietnam, not too long after I was cranking out really rough action/adventure stories on an orderly room typewriter at night after graduating from basic combat training.  It might have been me, or just the boredom of waiting for our next assignments, but there were guys standing at the typewriter waiting to rip out fresh pages and pass them around to other guys sitting in chairs along the walls.

The second from the left is Ed Gregory the mild-mannered reporter for a major metropolitan newspaper, The Tennessean, where I wrote mostly about business and technology.  Look! Up in the sky!  Okay, so I didn’t take it that far – but that’s mainly because, except during a gym rat period in my forties, I didn’t look good in tights.

The third from the left is Ed Gregory the song-slinger.  I produced a full box of half-written songs, and my original “thewritespot.com” Website, while participating in songwriting workshops for several years with hit writers whose names were on millions of records.  I learned quite a bit – like how to write a good song and, more importantly, that only great songs get cut.  Alas, that I did not seem destined to be among those who write a super hit that pays for a nice house.

Finally is Ed Gregory the cranioluminescent geek.  This is the me who was at home in a corporate cube farm as a technical writer and, later, analyst.  I got the role of Tina the techwriter, not even an understudy to Dilbert.  However, I do have a collection of cube life stories that will knock your  . . . wait, let me check the expiration date on my non-disclosure agreement and whether it has impacts on my retirement package.  (Just kidding, former bosses. [No, I'm not!])

There is no picture of Ed Gregory the fictionator.  He’s a work in progress, as are the stories that appear in these pages.  The he that is the me of now spends a lot of time writing, and reading about writing, and writing about reading about writing, and in blogs and discussion threads around the ‘Net with other fictionados.

~Ed Gregory
thewriteguy@thewritespot.com

I’m building a collection of short fiction at the urging of my muse, who was quiescent for 40 years and suddenly seems eager to make up for some of that lost time.

It includes:

  • Queen of the Sunday Morning Waffle House Crowd
  • What Goes Up
  • Camouflage
  • Honeysuckle in July
  • Oprah, Al Gore, the Dancer, and Me
  • Final Brush with the Law
  • It Rings True
  • The Glitch Who Saved Christmas

Two of these stories were entered in flash fiction contests online, so there are links to them.  The others are “unpublished” even here so that when they do reach the hands of potential publishers, I will be offering first publication rights rather than reprint rights.

Standard advice from stellar authors, like Stephen King and Ray Bradbury, is to have a daily writing goal and treat writing like any job.  Thanks, guys.  Now I have to worry about whether I’m going to lay myself off.

So my goal is to complete one short fiction work every week, even if I have to do an all-nighter every Saturday night until I make better use of “normal” working hours.

 

Queen of the Sunday Morning Waffle House Crowd

By W. Edward Gregory
© 2013
Literary Fiction
About 1,800 words

 

The door marked “Restrooms” swung open and Miss Annie Ledbetter toddled back into the restaurant proper, rearranging her gloves, umbrella, scarf, Sunday paper, Bible, and purse without losing a step.

Two of the three red booths nearest her were open, but the white-haired matron passed them by.

Two tables at the far end of the crowded breakfast counter were also open, but Annie continued only far enough to settle into the middle-most of the straight-backed waiting area chairs lined up along the front windows.

“Won’t be long, Hon,” said a woman identified by her yellow nametag as Ruby – Shift Manager – 23 Years Service.

The aptly named waitress spoke just loud enough to be heard over the rumble and sloshing of the silvery Hobart dishwasher.

Ruby gave the counter a couple of big swirls with a wet towel, then caught Annie’s attention and nodded toward the table in the corner where a mature couple, dressed as if for church, was sipping coffee.  Their napkins lay wadded up telltale on their nearly empty plates.

In return, Annie gave Ruby a quick little smile and thumbs-up sign.

Tourists and other non-regulars might have wondered if perhaps this genteel lady shunned the two empty booths at the right of the counter because of their proximity to a third booth that could barely contain three raucous young men whose explosive laughter was punctuated by animated arms and legs.

More cynical observers might wonder if, given her age and this being the Deep South, she was averse to sitting at one of the two vacant tables at the left end of the counter because the corner table was occupied by persons of color.

On either of those counts, they would be dead wrong.

“Miss Annie, your table is opening up,” Ruby called across the counter.

Annie’s eyes twinkled with anticipation. She remained in her chair a few moments longer as the church couple rose and headed for the register, the woman gathering up the bill as her male companion tossed some greenbacks on the table.

Rosita hurried down to clear and wipe the table.

Annie displayed a modicum of grace, for one with arms so full, as she navigated between the chairs at the back of the table and took her usual seat in the corner. She settled in and then pushed the table forward to get just a little more room for comfort.  Rosita helped with the table adjustment, as usual, and plopped down three napkins and three spoons.

“Just three coffees. Two with cream. Right, Miss Annie?” Rosita asked.

“Yes, sweetheart, if you please.”

Rosita spun around and stepped back behind the business side of the counter. Smiling, she called back over her shoulder, “Coming right up, Miss Annie! I made a fresh pot just for you!”

The “Miss” most folks used was a Southern affectation, a sign of respect and not so harsh-sounding as calling her “Mrs. Ledbetter.”  Folks called her Annie, or Miss Annie, or, sometimes, Ms.  Ledbetter.

Hardly anybody called her Mrs. Ledbetter anymore.  One exception was the third waitress on duty today. Mary Helen said “Good morning, Mrs. Ledbetter” with her mouth but not with her eyes. She had waited on the Ledbetters for years, but now was grumpy every Sunday morning when Annie came in.

Ruby, believing she had some understanding of what soured things between Miss Annie and Mary Helen, made it a rule that Mary Helen would not be assigned on Sundays to the section containing Annie’s favorite table.

This particular Sunday morning’s rush was a bit slower than average. Still, there was plenty of hustle in the air.

Ruby tucked a stray auburn and grey lock back under her hairnet and hat, raised her order pad, and sounded off.

“Three eggs over medium, two waffles, order covered in the ring, pull two sausage,” she shouted in the general direction of Big Al’s broad back.

This size of the order meant the police officer at the counter, a Ruby regular who paid his own tab and was a good tipper, was hungrier than usual this morning.

Rosita sidled closer to Al, dodging nervously as he moved in and out and around the grill area, and called out just a bit timidly, “Two eggs scrambled, order smothered and covered, pull one bacon.”

Mary Helen was the poster girl for honey-and-sunshine Southern grace most of the time. Today, because Annie was near, Mary Helen was drill-sergeant-gruff as she fired out the orders of the three teenagers and of two truckers seated at the counter.

Like a human cipher machine, Big Al soaked it all in, hands and arms and skillets and plates moving with hypnotic precision until at the end of an extended series of rattles and scrapes, clinks and clanks, the cook’s butcher block counter was covered by a row of glistening white plates all steaming with hot Southern-style breakfasts.

“Orders up!” the cook called out.  He stepped back and, in a grand gesture, spread his big arms wide to showcase his “art.”

When Big Al worked the busy shift, it really was a thing of beauty. People say the show he put on is part of the reason this place had so many regulars on Sunday mornings. He moved with the smooth grace of an Olympic gymnast – if Olympic gymnasts weighed north of 300 pounds, flipped omelets, and wore greasy white aprons and paper hats.

His prowess at the grill was not why Annie came every Sunday, although she was always happy to see him. She watched him today from her vantage point in the corner and chuckled softly when it occurred to her that Al looked like he was conducting a stainless steel symphony.

On Sundays, people flocked to the Waffle House either after early service or before late service. Annie preferred coming early, but her son, TJ, and husband, Tom Sr., preferred to skip church service and would come directly from their garage, sometimes hardly slowing enough to wash up properly.

The Ledbetter men looked forward to Al’s showmanship with spatula and omelet pan. But that came second to their joyful grins when talking rapid-fire about whatever the next step might be in their father-son restoration project. That pair had their heads and hands full of antique pickup truck every weekend, it seemed, from Saturday morning until 9:45 am Sunday when it was time to head out and meet up with Annie.

TJ and Tom Sr. did their best to get to the Waffle House in time to hold down the corner table for when Annie was finally through shaking hands and sharing warm regards with other members of the Ebenezer Lighthouse Victory Chapel.

Annie and Tom Sr. had continued coming to the Waffle House every Sunday after TJ’s National Guard unit deployed to Iraq, saving their absent son a place and ordering an extra coffee – black, the way TJ liked it.

The first time in recent history that anybody can remember all three Ledbetters missing a Waffle House Sunday was last December,… Continue reading

Honeysuckle in July

By W. Edward Gregory
© 2012
Real crime
About 475 words

 

She’d been dumped in a honeysuckle thicket just outside the town limits almost two weeks earlier. It was July, the South, and there had been no lack of visiting critters.

Later, I saw the blood-soaked mattress that her ex-husband turned over before he put their two toddlers back in the bed so he could leave and dispose of their mother’s body.

I only heard second hand about the vacant stares that greeted the church bus driver who stopped because he saw two little children wandering in pajamas in the front yard.  His bus was half-loaded with children not much older who, I hope, never learned why they were late for Sunday School that day.

That’s what being a reporter with friends on the department will get you.

I was a rookie stringer, but, having gotten the chief of detectives in this neighboring county on the front page of the big city paper, I wasn’t surprised at getting a call inviting me to join in the search for a murder victim’s body.

An hour after that call, I was on the edge of a country road at dusk, lined up with a bunch of strangers.  We spread out , raggedly spaced about six feet apart.  It was like being back in Army basic training, lined up for a police call of the company area.  But we weren’t looking for cigarette butts and litter.

We weren’t out there long before I heard the chief of police, just to my right, crying out in an odd voice.

“Oh God. I found her.”

Three steps and I was standing beside him and what was left of her. Instinct took over and my Pentax was in action, it’s strobe revealing in vivid flashes the nightmare at my feet.

Regrets continued to pile up that night.  The small town department’s official photographer wasn’t to be found.  Another officer had a camera, but since I was a “professional” and I was already there, it was decided by somebody that it made sense for me to take the pictures.  Pictures that would never accompany any story I wrote, but would have been shown to a jury if the killer took back his confession.

They asked me to meet the body at the morgue so I could take more pictures and then give them the film for processing.  I called in the story from the morgue while waiting for the body to arrive.  Then I took the pictures I try unsuccessfully not to remember while I’m writing this 40 years later.

Back at the paper the next day, I took a ribbing for not bringing the film back.  Not for publication, but for the morbid fascination of editors, reporters, and photographers who had themselves seen the same or worse – or were waiting their turn. Some asked brutally frank questions about the grisly details, hoping to harass this rookie.

What they didn’t know is that I was already inoculated, as much as you can be.  My own father was murdered when I was 16, and I was just a few years back from Vietnam.

I was already tough. I was already hardened. Yeah. Bullshit.

For nearly 40 years, I’ve wondered what became of those children who spent the night on a mattress soaked with their mother’s blood.

~~

Camouflage

By W. Edward Gregory
© 2012
Literary Fiction
About 700 words

 

The colors were all too familiar. Outside, the lumbering camouflaged C-130s almost melted into the surroundings. Inside, walls and furniture blended unevenly in variations of olive drab green.  Passengers waiting to escape the Central Highlands were dressed either in the mottled grey-green-black of jungle fatigues or in silk as black as jungle shadow.

How many of them wished me dead right now? How many had relatives who had been on the other side of the wire, or inside the wire . . .

A noise or a movement brought me back to a scene that was, thankfully, four decades newer. I was arriving at, not departing from, the Pleiku airport.  But why was I here? Ah, yes. The Visit.

My brother had returned home with a Vietnamese wife, and they learned that she could not bear children. In a moment of guilt or stupidity, I told her that when I received orders to leave Vietnam, my house-girl/lover pulled me aside. Crying, she pulled my hands over her rounded belly and said, “You no leave. You take me. I got baby for you.”

Those words gnawed on the frayed edges of my conscience for decades.

I’d spent my last three months of my tour in the boonies, without the niceties of barracks and hot water and her companionship. I was naïve for 20 and I didn’t know what three or four months pregnant should look like.  It didn’t seem real, but what did at the time? I pressed the equivalent of hundreds of dollars American – most of my going home pay – into her hands. I walked away to the sound of crying and cursing in English and Vietnamese.

My sister-in-law was certain several years later that the story must have been true. Her whole being wanted it to be true and she pleaded with me.

“I want adopt a baby who look Vietnamee and look like you, like your brother. Do you know mother name? Can you find her?”

I didn’t try. Not then. Not for 40 more years.

In fact, it wasn’t even I who tried. Not deliberately.  It was the Internet, some cells I donated to a VA research project while I was in for something else, a Communist government eager to use American technology and science to embarrass America, and who knows what else that combined and conspired to place my genetic fingerprints in plain view of a teenager in the Central Highlands who was trying to locate her American grandfather.

And here I was, again.  The airport was much more modern on this arrival than it had been on that departure. The clothing was a mix of Western and traditional. The mood was festive instead of somber – people talking in many languages, children laughing and running.

I was soaking it all in when the eddies and currents of the crowd suddenly shifted to open a corridor easing the passage of the small family toward the American standing frozen – me. A reluctant 10-year-old boy, a radiant 17-year-old girl, and their taciturn mother – whom I had hoped for decades was not real and now loved instantly and forever.

Her eyes were hazel like mine, a combination of brown and grey and green that had not served as camouflage for her. They were a beacon identifying her unmistakably and forever as the child of an American GI – to many a bitter reminder of what they called The American War.

She looked at me and I saw a slightly older and partially Asian version of my daughter back in Ohio. More wrinkled, I thought at first, from a harsh life under the sun. Then it was clear: some of those wrinkles went the wrong direction. They were scars.

Books and articles I finally mustered the courage to read explained, in soul-chilling terms, about the horrific treatment of Amer-Asian children. But this was not somebody in a book.  This was flesh of my flesh.

My blood froze and my muscles heard the silent warning: Incoming!

“You are my father?” she asked. Her voice was soft, but the words sent shockwaves through the ground.

I nodded. “Yes.”

“THU-BOOOOM!!” shouted the memories.  The ground shook again under my feet. No, it didn’t.

She wrinkled her brow and her nose disapprovingly.

“You are not so strong and beautiful as my mother told me.”

I could see that she instantly regretted the words, but I felt weak and ugly after all the years of knowing, or at least suspecting, and doing nothing.

She reached out and took my hand, looked to her children, then looked up at me with a beatific smile that turned time and distance into forgotten mist.

“We will go someplace quiet so you can you sing to us like you sang to my mother,” she said, “and then we will sing for you.”

~~

 

 

What Goes Up

By W. Edward Gregory
© 2012
Sci-Fi/Fantasy
About 1,500 words

 

Eight confirmed dead so far just halfway through Deputy Silas Harper’s evening shift.

Pace seemed to be picking up after a weekend lull. Most folks agreed it the temporary respite should be credited to the cold November rains that swept Driscoll County for the past several days.

“Make it nine,” Harper said into his dash-mounted mic after a half-naked body hit the pavement with a familiar sickening smack not thirty feet in front of his patrol car.

“You just left the station,” replied Chief Deputy Lars Carlson. “Hey, looks like you might the prize for ‘closest to home’ this month.”

Carlson was working dispatch because he could no longer handle field duty.  Decorated war veteran or not, he got violently ill each time he found a dropper.

“Hope it’s nobody we know,” the chief deputy said.

In a town the size of Three Rivers, everybody knew everybody – especially now.

“I’ll let you know in a bit,” replied Harper.

He snapped on his spotlight and swept it in a slow practiced arc to reveal the expected lumpy mass.

Damn! Right there in middle of the crosswalk on 12th and Eden where his wife once worked as a school crossing guard.

There wasn’t much need for schools and crossing guards these days.

Harper walked rather than rushed to the gruesome scene, knowing from experience that this one would be another DOI – Dead on Impact.  Through the spreading crimson puddle, the sight of the now-pink stripes marking the school crossing triggered a pang of guilt that he didn’t think as often these days about the cancer that took his wife so quickly.  He shrugged off the brief moment of guilt and looked up into the clear, cold, star-filled sky.

“I’m sorry you went the way you did, sugar,” he said into the silent night. “It hurts like hell that you’re gone, but you wouldn’t like it here.”

Harper stayed distracted from his personal grief since The Change, insulated from reality after people simply starting flying off.  The first ones looked like balloons on a blustery day – no control. Months passed and people started learning control, but there were still too many dropping like that poor soul in the crosswalk. The deputies who did show up for work these days faced long shifts responding to 9-1-1 calls and online reports of dead and injured.

The eggheads and the nutcases had adopted the same theory about why younger folks had fewer flight-related accidents:  younger meant they still believed in magic and didn’t panic as often.  They had fewer injuries and far fewer confirmed deaths, but life was grey with so many of the children just gone. Most of them couldn’t be found, and those who did return were beyond any semblance of parental control.

Peter Pan Syndrome. That’s what many were calling it in the news and the blogs. No pirates or Indians or giant crocodiles, but invisible magic fairy dust was as good an explanation as any other being offered for what caused The Change.

Others called it the Icarus Effect.  They said humankind wasn’t meant to fly, lacking the millions of years of avian instinct required to do so safely.  Flying was among the most ubiquitous of dreams – one that much of the world wished was not now coming true over and over.

“It’s a sign from God!” some preachers shouted on the talk radio stations.

“It’s a trick of Satan!” others warned on Web sites and in tent meetings.

The fear of God/fear of Satan furor was strongest locally around the religious commune that sprang up out at the Evergreen State Park cabin area. It was an unofficial “no fly zone” – unless you wanted to be shot from the sky.  Harper hated being dispatched out there.

Tonight, though, he was just blocks from the courthouse square.

Harper imagined the face of his Uncle Zachary and the strong family features they shared: dark deep-set eyes, bushy brows, high cheekbones.  Quaint or odd is what folks called Zachary Harper, and that’s when they were being kind.

Silas Harper replayed the unrelenting memory of the day his teenaged self told the old man how much he wanted to leave town, perhaps join the Air Force and become a fighter pilot.

Uncle Zachary’s answer seemed simpler at the time.

“Stay put and keep y’self grounded, boy,” his uncle had said. “That’s what will be important in the days to come.”

Ironic or prophetic? Harper didn’t know and didn’t want to.  He shivered as an invisible icy cold hand seemed to grip his shoulder the way Uncle Zachary used to, then shrugged it off as he always did.

With unnecessary gentleness,  he used his baton to turn the leaking tangle of limbs and torso to get a better look.

Damn, Harper thought. This mess here used to be Billy Morris, the last good bartender in town.

The lack of clothing other than striped boxer shorts and a t-shirt that might once have been white were evidence this flight happened unintentionally – likely as not in the middle of a dream.

Those who went of their own free will were attired for the event – sometimes dressed for adventure, sometimes whimsically – and often carried a backpack or other small bag.  Still, some of those who went of their own free will ended up as meat sacks like Billy here.

Deliberate fliers were prone to singing, laughing. Involuntary fliers often woke the neighbors with their screams.

The deputy tapped the mini-talky strapped to his chest.

“Harper here. You guys got any reports on Billy Morris?”

He heard a few muttered curses in the background at the station, and figured Carlson must be puking because the reply came in the gravely voice of Sheriff Tate.

“That who you got there, Silas? Damn!” the sheriff said.  “Did he go Peter Pan or Stephen King?”

“I’d say he’s another King,” Harper replied. “Billy sure wasn’t dressed for the occasion.  On a cold damp night like this, most of ‘em will be Kings.”

The sheriff grunted something that might have signaled agreement, then said, “Bag him and tag him.  We’ll take care of the notifications from here.”

Harper retrieved a bright orange tarp from the trunk of the patrol car and shook it free of the clear plastic wrapper whose label announced it was “Manufactured with Pride by the Sanicare Company of East Lansing.” He was not alone in thinking that label just didn’t seem proper somehow. But the bags were a necessity. Somebody had to make them and somebody else was going to profit.

He rolled the body roughly into the center of the tarp, cinched it up into a tidy package, and dragged it to the sidewalk before tagging it for the National Guard trucks to pick up on their morning run.

As he slid back behind the wheel to resume his evening patrol, Harper thought, for the umpteenth time, “Too bad more people didn’t have an Uncle Zachary.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Oprah, Al Gore, the Dancer, and Me

By W. Edward Gregory
© 2012
Fantasy
About 500 words

 

Oprah Winfrey looks directly into her close-up camera and says, “Next, as I promised you all before the break, we have that exciting new best-selling author: Ed Gregory!”

Thunderous applause accompanies my walk from stage left to a seat near Oprah.  Also on the guest couch, making room for me, are Al Gore and dancer-singer-actress Julianne Hough.

Oprah reaches out and warmly takes my hand.

“It’s great to finally meet you, Ed,” she gushes.

“Thanks,” I say. “Actually, we met years ago in Nashville when you were a cub TV reporter and I was a reporter for The Tennessean. We covered some of the same events.”

Oprah, taken slightly aback, says:

“You are THAT Ed Gregory??  No wonder I love your writing so much!”

Al gives my back a good-natured slap, smiles broadly, and says, “Grreeat to see you again, Ed!  Sorry we lost touch after I became Vice President.”

I shrug and smile, a small gesture indicating I understand and accept the apology of the man who served in the House, the Senate, as Vice President, and who won the 2000 US Presidential election popular vote,  a Grammy, an Oscar, and the Nobel Peace Prize.

“You know, Oprah, Ed and I talked a lot back when I was in Congress.  We talked about the environment, nuclear proliferation, the hidden costs of commercial nuclear power,” Al says.

Tightening his grip on my shoulder, he continues:

“I especially remember our talks about my efforts, while I was chairman of the House Science and Technology Subcommittee on Telecommunications, to open the door for commercialization of DARPANet into a public and global Information Superhighway.”

Some members of the audience – those who understood him – gasp at Al Gore’s long-delayed confirmation that, in a sense, he really did invent the Internet.  I curse myself for not getting those stories dumbed-down enough to get them past an editor.  If I had, then Al would surely have won in his first run for the White House.  I wonder briefly if  that’s why Tipper took me off their Christmas card list.

I quickly forget all that – again – as Julianne Hough smiles and sprouts new dimples just for me, requiring me to quickly drop my hands to my lap lest I divulge the full extent of my appreciation.

Ellen, my wife, interrupts and says, “Honey, unless you want to have to drive me to work, it’s time to wake up so you can get me to the train on time.”

NOTES ON THIS BLOG:  While this is merely a dream, the Oprah and Al connections are historically accurate and I do have Ellen’s dispensation to “admire” Julianne Hough should the opportunity arise. It’s a trade for a similar dispensation from me to her in the event Russel Crowe ever shows up at our house.  Alas, my big splash as described above doesn’t have much chance of coming true – unless, of course, Oprah resumes interviewing authors on TV.

ANSWERS TO UNASKED FAQS ABOUT  THE ABOVE NOTES ON THIS BLOG:
A:
Yes, I do play trumpet (or did long ago).
A:
No, I don’t mind blowing my own horn.
A:
Because I think there’s nothing wrong with pride in being a has-been with a new dream and great memories rather than being a never-was with only a dream.

 

~ Ed Gregory